Jarum Suntik

...Inilah penderitaan. Penderitaan biasa adalah satu hal; penderitaan yang di atas dan melebihi biasanya adalah hal yang lain lagi. Rasa sakit biasa dari tubuh yang terbentuk ini adalah rasa sakit ketika kamu berdiri, sakit ketika kamu duduk, sakit ketika kamu berbaring: Semua hal ini adalah penderitaan yang normal, penderitaan biasa bagi tubuh yang terbentuk ini. Sang Buddha juga mengalami perasaan-perasaan seperti ini. 

Dia merasakan kesenangan yang seperti ini,rasa sakit yang seperti ini, tetapi dia telah menyadari bahwa itu semua adalah hal yang biasa. Semua kesenangan dan rasa sakit biasa ini bisa dibawanya ke dalam ketenangan karena dia telah memahaminya. Beliau memahami penderitaan biasa: 

Hal ini adalah demikian adanya. Kesenangan dan penderitaan biasa tersebut tidaklah terlalu kuat. Sebagai gantinya, dia terus mengawasi penderitaan yang datang bertamu,penderitaan yang diatas dan melebihi biasanya.
Sama juga halnya ketika kita sakit dan pergi ke dokter untuk disuntik. Jarum suntik ditusukkan melalui kulit ke dalam daging kita. Akan terasa sakit sedikit,tetapi itu adalah hal yang biasa. Tidak ada yang perlu dibesar-besarkan. Ini yang harus terjadi pada semua orang. Penderitaan yang di atas dan melebihi penderitaan biasa adalah penderitaan upadana, atau kemelekatan. Hal ini seperti membasahi sebuah jarum suntik dengan racun dan menusukkannya ke dalam tubuh kita. Jarum tersebut tidak hanya menyakitimu dengan cara yang biasa: tidak sekedar penderitaan biasa. Melainkan jarum tersebut menyakiti hingga sanggup membunuhmu.

(Insight Vidyâsenâ Production)

Mengapa Ia Berat ?

Ketika penderitaan muncul, kamu harus melihat bahwa
ini adalah penderitaan, dan harus melihat darimana
penderitaan ini muncul. Akankah kamu melihat sesuatu?
Jika kita melihat penderitaan tersebut sebagai suatu hal
yang biasa, maka tidak akan ada penderitaan. Sebagai
contoh, ketika kita sedang duduk disini, kita merasa
tenang. Hingga pada suatu waktu kita ingin wadah
meludah ini, kita akan mengangkatnya. Sekarang kondisi
telah berubah. Mereka berubah dari keadaan ketika kita belum mengangkat wadah meludah. Ketika kita mengangkat wadah meludah ini, kita merasa menjadi lebih berat. Itulah alasannya. Mengapa kita merasa berat jika kita tidak mengangkat wadah meludah tersebut? Jika kita tidak mengangkatnya, maka tidak akan ada rasa berat. Jika kita tidak mengangkatnya,kita akan merasa ringan. Jadi mana yang merupakan penyebab dan mana yang merupakan hasil? Yang perlu kamu lakukan hanyalah mengamati hal ini dengan sungguh-sungguh maka kamu akan mengetahuinya.Kamu tidak perlu pergi kemana-mana untuk belajar.
Ketika kita melekat pada sesuatu, itulah sumber penderitaan. Ketika kita melepaskannya maka tidak akan ada penderitaan.

(Insight Vidyâsenâ Production)

Yatim Piatu

Pikiran kita, ketika tidak ada yang menjaganya,
adalah seperti seorang anak tanpa orang tua yang
menjaganya –seorang anak yatim piatu, seorang anak
tanpa pelindung. Seseorang tanpa seorang pelindung
akan mengalami penderitaan-penderitaan, dan sama
halnya dengan pikiran. Jika pikiran tidak terlatih, jika
pandangan-pandangannya telah keluar dari pandangan
benar, maka pikiran hanya akan mengalami berbagai
macam masalah.

(Insight Vidyâsenâ Production)

Air Berwarna

Hati kita, ketika dalam kondisi normal, adalah seperti
air hujan. Airnya bersih, jernih, bening, dan normal. Jika
kita memasukkan pewarna hijau ke dalam air, atau
pewarna kuning ke dalam air, maka warna air akan
berubah menjadi hijau, atau menjadi kuning.
Hal yang sama terjadi dengan pikiran kita: ketika pikiran
bertemu dengan sebuah objek yang ia suka, maka ia
akan merasa senang. Ketika ia bertemu dengan sebuah
objek yang tidak ia suka, pikiran akan menjadi suram dan tidak nyaman –sama seperti air yang berubah menjadi hijau ketika kamu menambahkan pewarna hijau ke dalamnya, atau berwarna kuning ketika kamu menambahkan pewarna kuning. 

Air akan terus merubah warnanya.

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Dedaunan

Ketika kita duduk di hutan yang sunyi, dan tidak ada
angin yang bertiup, maka dedaunan akan tetap tenang
pada pohonnya. Ketika angin bertiup, dedaunan pun
berguguran.
Pikiran sama seperti dedaunan ini. Ketika ia bersentuhan
dengan sebuah objek, ia akan bergetar sesuai dengan
sifat alaminya. Semakin sedikit kamu mengetahui
Dhamma, semakin besar getaran pikiranmu. Ketika
pikiran merasakan kesenangan, maka ia mati dalam
kesenangan. Ketika pikiran merasakan kesakitan, ia
mati dalam kesakitan. Pikiran terus bergerak dalam
cara seperti ini.

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Awal adalah Akhir

Tahukah kamu, ketika kita lahir kita telah mati.
Kehidupan dan kematian adalah hal yang sama. 

Seperti sebatang pohon. Sebagian dari pohon itu adalah batang bagian bawah; bagian lainnya adalah akhir dari ujung batang pohon. Jika tidak ada batang bagian bawah
maka tidak akan ada ujung batang pohon tersebut.
Ketika ada ujung batang pohon, maka disana akan
ada batang bagian bawah. Ujung batang tanpa batang
bagian bawah: Adalah hal yang tidak mungkin terjadi.
Demikian hal ini berlangsung.Dengan demikian adalah hal yang lucu. Ketika seseorang meninggal, kita merasa sedih dan kecewa. Kita duduk dan menangis, berduka, dan sebagainya. Hal tersebut adalah pengetahuan yang salah. Itu adalah delusi.Bahwa ketika seseorang meninggal maka kita akan sedih dan menangis. Itulah yang selalu dilakukan entah mulai sejak kapan. Kita tidak berhenti untuk memeriksa hal ini secara lebih hati-hati. 

Sesungguhnya –dan maafkan saya untuk mengatakan hal berikut- menurut saya jika kamu
menangis ketika seseorang meninggal, maka akan lebih baik jika kamu menangis ketika seseorang dilahirkan.Tetapi coba kita lihat ke belakang. 

Ketika seorang anak dilahirkan, orang-orang gembira dan tertawa karena bahagia. 

Akan tetapi sesungguhnya kelahiran adalah kematian. Kematian adalah kelahiran. 

Awal adalah akhir; akhir adalah awal.

(Insight Vidyâsenâ Production)

Raja Kematian

Kita hidup seperti seekor ayam yang tidak tahu apa yang
sedang terjadi. Di pagi hari, ayam akan membawa anak-anaknya keluar untuk mengais mencari makanan. Pada
malam hari, mereka kembali untuk tidur di kandang.
Keesokan paginya, mereka akan keluar untuk mencari
makanan lagi. Si pemilik akan menaburkan beras untuk
mereka makan setiap hari, tetapi ayam-ayam tersebut
tidak mengetahui mengapa si pemilik memberi mereka
makan. Si ayam dan sang pemilik berpikir dalam cara
yang berbeda.Pemilik berpikir, “Berapa berat ayam ini?” Si ayam,pikirannya, terpikat pada makanan. Ketika sang pemilik mengangkatnya untuk ditimbang, ia berpikir sang pemilik sedang menunjukkan kasih sayang.Kita juga, tidak mengetahui apa yang sedang terjadi: darimana kita berasal, berapa tahun lagi kita akan hidup, kemana kita akan pergi, siapa yang akan mengantar kita ke sana. Kita tidak mengetahui ini semua sama sekali.

Raja kematian adalah seperti sang pemilik ayam. Kita tidak mengetahui kapan dia akan menangkap kita,karena kita terpikat –terpikat pada penglihatan, suara,penciuman, rasa,sensasi indra peraba, dan buah-buah pikiran. Kita tidak sadar bahwa kita semakin bertambah tua. Kita tidak punya kesadaran untuk merasa cukup.

(Insight Vidyâsenâ Production)

Ekor Ular

Kita sebagai manusia tidak menginginkan penderitaan.
Kita tidak ingin yang lain selain kesenangan. Tetapi
sesungguhnya, kesenangan merupakan penderitaan yang
halus, tidak kentara. Rasa sakit adalah penderitaan
yang nyata. Sederhananya, penderitaan dan kesenangan
seperti seekor ular. Kepalanya adalah penderitaan, ekornya adalah kesenangan. Di kepalanya terdapat racun. Mulutnya mengandung racun. Jika kamu mendekati kepala si ular, ia akan menggigitmu. Jika kamu memegang ekornya sepertinya aman-aman saja, tetapi apabila kamu tetap memegang ekornya tanpa melepaskannya, ular tersebut akan berbalik dan menggigitmu juga. Hal ini dikarenakan baik kepala ular maupun ekornya terdapat pada satu tubuh ular yang sama.
Baik kebahagiaan maupun kesedihan berasal dari sumber yang sama: kemelekatan dan kegelapan batin.
Itulah mengapa ada waktunya ketika kamu bahagia tetapi tetap merasa gelisah dan tidak nyaman –bahkan ketika kamu telah memperoleh hal yang kamu suka,seperti pencapaian materi, status, dan dipuji. Ketika kamu memperoleh hal-hal ini kamu merasa senang,
tetapi sebenarnya pikiranmu tidak benar-benar damai karena ada kekhawatiran bahwa kamu akan kehilangan hal-hal tersebut. Kamu takut sumber kesenangan ini akan menghilang. Ketakutan ini yang menyebabkan kamu jauh dari kedamaian. Terkadang kamu ternyata
benar-benar kehilangan hal-hal ini dan saat itulah kamu menjadi sangat menderita.
Ini berarti bahwa bahkan apabila hal-hal ini membahagiakan, penderitaan berada dibalik kebahagiaan tersebut. Kita hanya tidak menyadarinya. Sama seperti ketika kita memegang
seekor ular: Meskipun kita memegang ekornya, jika kita tetap memegang ular tersebut tanpa melepaskannya,ular tersebut akan balik dan menggigit kita.
Dengan demikian, kepala ular dan ekor ular, kejahatan dan kebaikan: Inilah yang membentuk sebuah lingkaran yang akan terus berputar. Itulah mengapa kesenangan dan rasa sakit, baik dan buruk bukanlah sang jalan (menuju kesucian).

(Insight Vidyâsenâ Production)

Anak-Anak Peluru

Sebuah pistol menembakkan anak-anaknya –pelurunya keluar. Sedangkan kita menembakkan peluru kita ke arah dalam, ke hati kita. Ketika anak-anak kita baik,kita memasukkannya ke dalam hati. Ketika mereka nakal, kita juga memasukkannya ke dalam hati. Mereka adalah akibat dari hubungan kamma, anak-anak kita.
Mereka ada yang baik, ada yang buruk, tetapi baik yang
baik ataupun yang buruk kesemuanya adalah anak-anak
kita yang sama.Ketika mereka lahir, lihatlah diri kita: semakin buruk mereka, semakin kita cinta mereka. Jika salah satu nya terlahir dengan polio dan menjadi pincang, dia adalah yang paling kita cintai. 
Ketika kita meninggalkan rumah, kita memberitahu anak yang lebih tua, “Jagalah adik kecilmu. Jagalah yang satu ini” –karena kita mencintainya. Kemudian ketika kita akan meninggal dunia, kita memberitahu mereka, “Jagalah dia.Jagalah anakku.” Anak tersebut tidak kuat, karena itu kamu semakin mencintainya melebihi lainnya.

(Insight Vidyâsenâ Production)

Sebalok Es

Jika kamu meletakkan satu balok es yang besar di tempat terbuka di bawah sinar matahari, kamu akan melihat es tersebut musnah –sama halnya dengan umur tubuh manusia- sedikit demi sedikit, sedikit demi sedikit.
Setelah beberapa menit, atau beberapa jam, es tersebut akan mencair semuanya menjadi air. Inilah yang disebut khaya-vaya: kematian, kemerosotan.
Kemerosotan benda-benda bentukan telah berlangsung sejak dulu, bahkan sejak dunia terbentuk. Ketika kita dilahirkan, kita juga telah menerima kemerosotan ini.
Kita tidak membuangnya kemana pun juga. Ketika kita dilahirkan, kita juga menerima penyakit, usia tua, dan kematian. Kita memperoleh semua itu di waktu yang sama.
Lihatlah pada bagaimana tubuh kita menjadi semakin merosot. Setiap bagian merosot. Rambut di kepala akan merosot; rambut di tubuh akan merosot; kuku-kuku jari tangan dan kaki akan merosot; kulit akan merosot. 

Semua hal, tidak peduli benda apapun juga, kemerosotan adalah sifat alaminya.

(Insight Vidyâsenâ Production)

Roda Pedati,Jejak Pedati

Siklus kelahiran kembali adalah seperti sebuah roda pedati. Ibarat seekor lembu sedang menarik pedati.Jika lembu tersebut tetap menarik pedati tanpa berhenti, maka jejak pedati akan terus menghapus jejak lembu tanpa berhenti. Roda pedati tidaklah panjang, tetapiia bulat. Kamu bisa mengatakan bahwa roda pedati itu panjang, tetapi panjang mereka itu adalah bulat.
Kita melihat kebulatan roda tersebut, kita tidak melihat panjangnya.
Sepanjang lembu itu menarik pedati tanpa berhenti,maka roda pedati akan terus berputar tanpa henti.Hingga suatu hari lembu tersebut berhenti. Dia capek. Dia menjatuhkan lukunya –kayu pikul.
Si lembu kemudian pergi, meninggalkan pedatinya. Roda pedati berhenti dengan sendirinya. Jika kamu meninggalkan pedati tersebut di sana dalam waktu yang lama, maka mereka akan hancur membusuk menjadi tanah, air, angin, dan api, kembali menjadi rumput dan debu.Ini sama halnya dengan orang yang masih membuat kamma: mereka tidak menuju ke pembebasan. Orang yang hanya membicarakan kebenaran tidak menuju ke pembebasan. Orang dengan pandangan yang salah tidak menuju ke pembebasan.



(Insight Vidyâsenâ Production)

Dompet yang Hilang

Ini sama seperti ketika kamu meninggalkan rumah  dan kehilangan dompetmu. Dompet tersebut jatuh dari kantong dalam perjalanan, tetapi selama kamu belum menyadarinya kamu akan merasa tenang saja - merasa tenang karena kamu belum mengetahui untuk apa ketenangan ini. 
Ketenangan ini untuk kepentingan ketidak-tenangan di waktu berikutnya. Ketika kamu pada akhirnya melihat bahwa kamu telah kehilangan uangmu: Itulah saat kamu merasa tidak tenang –tepat ketika kehilangan tersebut ada di depanmu.
Sama halnya dengan tindakan buruk dan tindakan baik kita. Sang Buddha mengajarkan kita untuk mengenalkan diri kita mengenai hal ini.  
Jika kita tidak mengenali hal ini, maka kita tidak akan memiliki kebijaksanaan untuk
mengetahui mana yang benar atau mana yang salah, mana yang baik atau mana yang buruk.




(Insight Vidyâsenâ Production)

MONYET

Mari saya berikan kamu sebuah contoh. Anggap kamu memiliki seekor monyet peliharaan di rumah. Ia tidak sedang duduk diam. Ia suka melompat kesana kemari dan mengambil ini dan itu –semua jenis benda. 
Itulah sebagaimana adanya monyet. 

Sekarang kamu datang ke vihara. Kami memiliki seekor monyet juga disini,dan monyet ini juga tidak mau diam. Ia melompat kesana kemari dan mengambil barang-barang sama seperti monyet di rumah, tetapi ia tidak membuatmu merasa terganggu bukan?
Mengapa? Karena kamu telah mempunyai seekor monyet.
Kamu tahu apa yang suka monyet lakukan. “Monyet yang ada di rumah saya juga sama seperti monyet disini di vihara. Monyetmu seperti monyetku.
Mereka adalah monyet yang sama.” Bahkan jika kamu hanya mengenal satu monyet,
tidak peduli ke provinsi manapun kamu pergi, tidak peduli berapa banyak monyet yang kamu lihat, mereka tidak akan membuatmu merasa terganggu bukan?
Itulah orang yang memahami monyet.
Jika kita memahami monyet maka kita tidak akan menjadi monyet.
Jika kamu tidak memahami monyet maka segera ketika kamu melihat seekor monyet,
kamu akan menjadi seekor monyet itu sendiri, bukan?
Ketika kamu melihat ia mengambil ini dan itu, kamu berpikir,“Grrr!”
Kamu menjadi marah dan merasa terganggu. “Monyet sialan itu!”
Itulah seseorang yang tidak memahami monyet.
Seseorang yang memahami monyet melihat bahwa monyet di rumah dan  monyet di Wat Tham Saeng Phet adalah monyet yang sama, jadi mengapa mereka membuatmu merasa terganggu? Ketika kamu melihat bahwa demikian sebagaimana adanya monyet berlaku,itu sudah cukup. Kamu dapat berada dalam kedamaian.
Jika monyet tersebut berlari ke sana kemari, ia hanyalah monyet yang sedang berlari.
Kamu tidak menjadi seekor monyet juga. Kamu berada dalam kedamaian.
Jika ia melompat ke depanmu dan ke belakangmu, kamu tidak merasa terganggu oleh monyet tersebut. Mengapa?
Karena kamu memahami monyet, dan karenanya kamu tidak menjadi seekor monyet.
Jika kamu tidak memahami monyet, kamu akan merasa terganggu.
Ketika kamu merasa terganggu, kamu menjadi seekor monyet –paham?
Inilah bagaimana segalanya berkembang menjadi ketenangan.
Ketika kita mengenali objek-objek indera, amati objek-objek tersebut:
Beberapa menyenangkan, beberapa tidak, meskipun demikian terus kenapa?
Itu adalah urusan mereka sendiri. Itu adalah apa yang mereka suka.
Sama seperti monyet. Semua monyet adalah monyet yang sama.
Kita memahami objek-objek indera.
Terkadang mereka menyenangkan, terkadang tidak.
Itu adalah sebagaimana adanya mereka. Kita harus mengenali mereka.
Ketika kita mengenali mereka, kita akan melepas mereka.
Objek-objek indera bukanlah hal yang pasti. Mereka tidak kekal, penuh kesedihan,
dan tanpa-aku. Kita tetap memandang mereka dengan cara ini.
Ketika mata, telinga, hidung, lidah, tubuh, dan pikiran menerima objek-objek yang datang masuk, kita mengenali mereka, sama seperti melihat monyet.
Monyet ini sama saja seperti monyet di rumah.
Maka kita akan berada pada kedamaian.



(Insight Vidyâsenâ Production)

Akar

Kita bagaikan sebuah pohon dengan akar-akar, 

sebuah pangkal batang, dan sebuah batang. 

Setiap daun,setiap cabang, tergantung pada akar 

untuk menyerap nutrisi dari tanah dan mengirimkannya 

ke atas untuk menghidupi pohon.
Tubuh kita, termasuk ucapan dan perbuatan kita,
indra penglihatan, pendengaran, penciuman, perasa,
dan peraba kita, adalah sama seperti cabang, daun,
dan batang pohon. Pikiran sama seperti akar yang menyerap nutrisi dan mengirimkannya melalui batang ke daun-daun dan cabang-cabang sehingga mereka dapat berbunga dan menghasilkan buah.

( Insight Vidyâsenâ Production )

Gajah,Lembu Jantan dan Kerbau

Melatih pikiran adalah sebuah kegiatan yang berguna.
Kamu dapat melihat peristiwa ini bahkan dalam hewan pekerja, seperti gajah,lembu, dan kerbau. 
Sebelum kita dapat membuat mereka bekerja, kita harus melatih mereka terlebih dahulu. Hanya ketika mereka telah terlatih dengan baik, kita dapat menggunakan  kekuatan mereka dan mempekerjakan mereka untuk berbagai tujuan. 
Kalian semua tentu mengetahui hal ini.
Pikiran yang terlatih dengan baik memiliki nilai berlipat kali lebih besar. 
Lihatlah pada Sang Buddha dan para siswa muliaNya. 
Mereka merubah status mereka dari orang biasa menjadi orang yang dimuliakan, dan dihargai oleh semua orang. 
Mereka telah memberikan manfaat kepada kita dalam cara yang lebih luas daripada yang dapat kita temukan. 
Semua ini datang dari kenyataan bahwa mereka telah melatih pikiran mereka dengan baik.
Pikiran yang terlatih dengan baik sangat berguna bagi setiap pekerjaan. 
Pikiran yang terlatih memungkinkan kita untuk melakukan pekerjaan dengan hati-hati.
Pikiran tersebut membuat kita lebih bijaksana daripada menuruti emosi, 
dan memungkinkan kita untuk mengalami sebuah kebahagiaan yang sesuai dengan
lingkungan kita dalam kehidupan.




( Insight Vidyâsenâ Production )

Tepat Berada Di sini

Buddha adalah Dhamma; Dhamma adalah Buddha.
Buddha tidak membawa pergi pengetahuan yang telah disadariNya. 

Beliau meninggalkannya tepat disini. 

Dalam bahasa yang lebih sederhana, ini seperti para guru di sekolah. 

Mereka tidak menjadi guru sejak lahir. 

Mereka harus mempelajari ilmu keguruan sebelum mereka bisa menjadi guru, 

mengajar di sekolah dan memperoleh penghasilan. 

Setelah suatu waktu, mereka akan meninggal –atau tidak lagi menjadi seorang guru. 

Tetapi kamu dapat mengatakan bahwa para guru tersebut tidaklah meninggal. 

Kualitas-kualitas yang membuat orang tersebut menjadi guru tetap lah ada di sini. 

Hal ini sama juga dengan Sang Buddha. 

Kebenaran mulia yang telah membuat beliau menjadi seorang Buddha tetap
berada tepat di sini. Kebenaran mulia tersebut tidaklah pudar sama sekali.

( Insight Vidyâsenâ Production )

Air Tanah.

Buddha adalah Dhamma; Dhamma adalah Buddha.
Dhamma yang telah disadari Sang Buddha adalah sesuatu yang selalu ada di dunia. 

Dhamma tidak akan menghilang. 

Dhamma seperti air tanah. 

Siapa saja yang menggali sumur hingga ke lapisan air tanah akan menemukan air. 

Jadi orang tersebut bukanlah yang menciptakan atau membuat air menjadi ada. 

Yang dia lakukan hanyalah menggunakan tenaganya untuk menggali sumur hingga cukup dalam untuk mencapai air yang memang sudah ada disana.
Jadi, apabila kita memiliki kebijaksanaan, kita akan menyadari bahwa sesungguhnya kita tidaklah jauh dari Buddha. 

Kita semua duduk tepat di depanNya saat ini. 

Kapanpun kita memahami Dhamma, kita melihat Buddha. 

Mereka yang dengan sungguh-sungguh mempraktekkan Dhamma secara terus 

menerus–dimanapun mereka duduk, berdiri, atau berjalan pastinya akan mendengarkan Dhamma Sang Buddha setiap saat.

( Insight Vidyâsenâ Production )

Menuju Samudra

Aliran air, danau, dan sungai yang mengalir turun ke samudra, 

ketika mereka mencapai samudra, 

semuanya mempunyai warna biru yang sama, 

mempunyai rasa asin yang sama.
Sama halnya dengan manusia: 

Tidak masalah dari mana mereka berasal, 

ketika mereka mencapai arus Dhamma,
semuanya adalah Dhamma yang sama.

( Insight Vidyâsenâ Production )

Rumahmu yang Sesungguhnya.

Bangunan rumahmu itu bukanlah rumahmu yang sesungguhnya.
Itu adalah rumah yang kamu kira, rumahmu di dunia.
Sementara rumahmu yang sesungguhnya, adalah kedamaian.
Sang Buddha mengajarkan kita untuk membangun rumah kita sendiri dengan cara melepas hingga kita mencapai kedamaian.

(Insight Vidyâsenâ Production)

1. Making the Heart Good

These days people are going all over the place looking for merit2. And they always seem to stop over in Wat Pah Pong. If they don't stop over on the way, they stop over on the return journey. Wat Pah Pong has become a stop-over point. Some people are in such a hurry I don't even get a chance to see or speak to them. Most of them are looking for merit. I don't see many looking for a way out of wrongdoing. They're so intent on getting merit they don't know where they're going to put it. It's like trying to dye a dirty, unwashed cloth.

Monks talk straight like this, but it's hard for most people to put this sort of teaching into practice. It's hard because they don't understand. If they understood it would be much easier. Suppose there was a hole, and there was something at the bottom of it. Now anyone who put their hand into the hole and didn't reach the bottom would say the hole was too deep. Out of a hundred or a thousand people putting their hands down that hole, they'd all say the hole was too deep. Not one would say their arm was too short!

There are so many people looking for merit. Sooner or later they'll have to start looking for a way out of wrongdoing. But not many people are interested in this. The teaching of the Buddha is so brief, but most people just pass it by, just like they pass through Wat Pah Pong. For most people that's what the Dhamma is, a stop-over point.

Only three lines, hardly anything to it: Sabba-pāpassa akaranam: refraining from all wrongdoing. That's the teaching of all Buddhas. This is the heart of Buddhism. But people keep jumping over it, they don't want this one. The renunciation of all wrongdoing, great and small, from bodily, verbal and mental actions... this is the teaching of the Buddhas.

If we were to dye a piece of cloth we'd have to wash it first. But most people don't do that. Without looking at the cloth, they dip it into the dye straight away. If the cloth is dirty, dying it makes it come out even worse than before. Think about it. Dying a dirty old rag, would that look good?

You see? This is how Buddhism teaches, but most people just pass it by. They just want to perform good works, but they don't want to give up wrongdoing. It's just like saying ''the hole is too deep.'' Everybody says the hole is too deep, nobody says their arm is too short. We have to come back to ourselves. With this teaching you have to take a step back and look at yourself.

Sometimes they go looking for merit by the busload. Maybe they even argue on the bus, or they're drunk. Ask them where they're going and they say they're looking for merit. They want merit but they don't give up vice. They'll never find merit that way.

This is how people are. You have to look closely, look at yourselves. The Buddha taught about having recollection and self-awareness in all situations. Wrongdoing arises in bodily, verbal and mental actions. The source of all good, evil, weal and harm lies with actions, speech and thoughts. Did you bring your actions, speech and thoughts with you today? Or have you left them at home? This is where you must look, right here. You don't have to look very far away. Look at your actions, speech and thoughts. Look to see if your conduct is faulty or not.

People don't really look at these things. Like the housewife washing the dishes with a scowl on her face. She's so intent on cleaning the dishes, she doesn't realize her own mind's dirty! Have you ever seen this? She only sees the dishes. She's looking too far away, isn't she? Some of you have probably experienced this, I'd say. This is where you have to look. People concentrate on cleaning the dishes but they let their minds go dirty. This is not good, they're forgetting themselves.

Because they don't see themselves people can commit all sorts of bad deeds. They don't look at their own minds. When people are going to do something bad they have to look around first to see if anyone is looking... ''Will my mother see me?'' ''Will my husband see me?'' ''Will my children see me?'' ''Will my wife see me?'' If there's no-one watching then they go right ahead and do it. This is insulting themselves. They say no-one is watching, so they quickly finish the job before anyone will see. And what about themselves? Aren't they a ''somebody''?

You see? Because they overlook themselves like this, people never find what is of real value, they don't find the Dhamma. If you look at yourselves you will see yourselves. Whenever you are about to do something bad, if you see yourself in time you can stop. If you want to do something worthwhile then look at your mind. If you know how to look at yourself then you'll know about right and wrong, harm and benefit, vice and virtue. These are the things we should know about.

If I don't talk of these things you won't know about them. You have greed and delusion in the mind but don't know it. You won't know anything if you are always looking outside. This is the trouble with people not looking at themselves. Looking inwards you will see good and evil. Seeing goodness, we can take it to heart and practice accordingly.

Giving up the bad, practicing the good... this is the heart of Buddhism. Sabba-pāpassa akaranam - Not committing any wrongdoing, either through body, speech or mind. That's the right practice, the teaching of the Buddhas. Now ''our cloth'' is clean.

Then we have kusalassūpasampadā - making the mind virtuous and skillful. If the mind is virtuous and skillful we don't have to take a bus all over the countryside looking for merit. Even sitting at home we can attain to merit. But most people just go looking for merit all over the countryside without giving up their vices. When they return home it's empty-handed they go, back to their old sour faces. There they are washing the dishes with a sour face, so intent on cleaning the dishes. This is where people don't look, they're far away from merit.

We may know of these things, but we don't really know if we don't know within our own minds. Buddhism doesn't enter our heart. If our mind is good and virtuous it is happy. There's a smile in our heart. But most of us can hardly find time to smile, can we? We can only manage to smile when things go our way. Most people's happiness depends on having things go to their liking. They have to have everybody in the world say only pleasant things. Is that how you find happiness? Is it possible to have everybody in the world say only pleasant things? If that's how it is when will you ever find happiness?

We must use Dhamma to find happiness. Whatever it may be, whether right or wrong, don't blindly cling to it. Just notice it then lay it down. When the mind is at ease then you can smile. The minute you become averse to something the mind goes bad. Then nothing is good at all.

Sacittapariyodapanam: Having cleared away impurities the mind is free of worries... peaceful, kind and virtuous. When the mind is radiant and has given up evil, there is ease at all times. The serene and peaceful mind is the true epitome of human achievement.

When others say things to our liking, we smile. If they say things that displease us we frown. How can we ever get others to say things only to our liking every single day? Is it possible? Even your own children... have they ever said things that displease you? Have you ever upset your parents? Not only other people, but even our own minds can upset us. Sometimes the things we ourselves think of are not pleasant. What can you do? You might be walking along and suddenly kick a tree stump... Thud!... ''Ouch!''... Where's the problem? Who kicked who anyway? Who are you going to blame? It's your own fault. Even our own mind can be displeasing to us. If you think about it, you'll see that this is true. Sometimes we do things that even we don't like. All you can say is ''Damn!'', there's no-one else to blame.

Merit or boon in Buddhism is giving up that which is wrong. When we abandon wrongness then we are no longer wrong. When there is no stress there is calm. The calm mind is a clean mind, one which harbors no angry thoughts, which is clear.

How can you make the mind clear? Just by knowing it. For example, you might think, ''Today I'm in a really bad mood, everything I look at offends me, even the plates in the cupboard.'' You might feel like smashing them up, every single one of them. Whatever you look at looks bad, the chickens, the ducks, the cats and dogs... you hate them all. Everything your husband says is offensive. Even looking into your own mind you aren't satisfied. What can you do in such a situation? Where does this suffering come from? This is called ''having no merit.'' These days in Thailand they have a saying that when someone dies his merit is finished. But that's not the case. There are plenty of people still alive who've finished their merit already... those people who don't know merit. The bad mind just collects more and more badness.

Going on these merit-making tours is like building a beautiful house without preparing the area beforehand. In no long time the house will collapse, won't it? The design was no good. Now you have to try again, try a different way. You have to look into yourself, looking at the faults in your actions, speech and thoughts. Where else are you going to practice, other than at your actions, speech and thoughts? People get lost. They want to go and practice Dhamma where it's really peaceful, in the forest or at Wat Pah Pong. Is Wat Pah Pong peaceful? No, it's not really peaceful. Where it's really peaceful is in your own home.

If you have wisdom wherever you go you will be carefree. The whole world is already just fine as it is. All the trees in the forest are already just fine as they are: there are tall ones, short ones, hollow ones... all kinds. They are simply the way they are. Through ignorance of their true nature we go and force our opinions onto them... ''Oh, this tree is too short! This tree is hollow!'' Those trees are simply trees, they're better off than we are.

That's why I've had these little poems written up in the trees here. Let the trees teach you. Have you learned anything from them yet? You should try to learn at least one thing from them. There are so many trees, all with something to teach you. Dhamma is everywhere, in everything in nature. You should understand this point. Don't go blaming the hole for being too deep... turn around and look at your own arm! If you can see this you will be happy.

If you make the merit or virtue, preserve it in your mind. That's the best place to keep it. Making merit as you have done today is good, but it's not the best way. Constructing buildings is good, but it's not the best thing. Building your own mind into something good is the best way. This way you will find goodness whether you come here or stay at home. Find this excellence within your mind. Outer structures like this hall here are just like the ''bark'' of the ''tree'', they're not the ''heartwood.''

If you have wisdom, wherever you look there will be Dhamma. If you lack wisdom, then even the good things turn bad. Where does this badness come from? Just from our own minds, that's where. Look how this mind changes. Everything changes. Husband and wife used to get on all right together, they could talk to each other quite happily. But there comes a day when their mood goes bad, everything the spouse says seems offensive. The mind has gone bad, it's changed again. This is how it is.

So in order to give up evil and cultivate the good you don't have to go looking anywhere else. If your mind has gone bad, don't go looking over at this person and that person. Just look at your own mind and find out where these thoughts come from. Why does the mind think such things? Understand that all things are transient. Love is transient, hate is transient. Have you ever loved your children? Of course you have. Have you ever hated them? I'll answer that for you, too... Sometimes you do, don't you? Can you throw them away? No, you can't throw them away. Why not? Children aren't like bullets, are they3? Bullets are fired outwards, but children are fired right back to the parents. If they're bad it comes back to the parents. You could say children are your kamma. There are good ones and bad ones. Both good and bad are right there in your children. But even the bad ones are precious. One may be born with polio, crippled and deformed, and be even more precious than the others. Whenever you leave home for a while you have to leave a message, ''Look after the little one, he's not so strong.'' You love him even more than the others.

You should, then, set your minds well - half love, half hate. Don't take only one or the other, always have both sides in mind. Your children are your kamma, they are appropriate to their owners. They are your kamma, so you must take responsibility for them. If they really give you suffering, just remind yourself, ''It's mykamma.'' If they please you, just remind yourself, ''It's my kamma.'' Sometimes it gets so frustrating at home you must just want to run away. It gets so bad some people even contemplate hanging themselves! It's kamma. We have to accept the fact. Avoid bad actions, then you will be able to see yourself more clearly.

This is why contemplating things is so important. usually when they practice meditation they use a meditation object, such asBud-dho, Dham-mo or San-gho. But you can make it even shorter than this. Whenever you feel annoyed, whenever your mind goes bad, just say ''So!'' When you feel better just say ''So!... It's not a sure thing.'' If you love someone, just say ''So!'' When you feel you're getting angry, just say ''So!'' Do you understand? You don't have to go looking into the tipitaka4. Just ''So!'' This means ''it's transient.'' Love is transient, hate is transient, good is transient, evil is transient. How could they be permanent? Where is there any permanence in them?

You could say that they are permanent insofar as they are invariably impermanent. They are certain in this respect, they never become otherwise. One minute there's love, the next hate. That's how things are. In this sense they are permanent. That's why I say whenever love arises, just tell it ''So!'' It saves a lot of time. You don't have to say ''Aniccam, dukkham, anattā.'' If you don't want a long meditation theme, just take this simple word... If love arises, before you get really lost in it, just tell yourself ''So!'' This is enough.

Everything is transient, and it's permanent in that it's invariably that way. Just to see this much is to see the heart of the Dhamma, the True Dhamma.

Now if everybody said ''So!'' more often, and applied themselves to training like this, clinging would become less and less. People would not be so stuck on love and hate. They would not cling to things. They would put their trust in the truth, not with other things. Just to know this much is enough, what else do you need to know?

Having heard the teaching, you should try to remember it also. What should you remember? Meditate... Do you understand? If you understand, the Dhamma clicks with you, the mind will stop. If there is anger in the mind, just ''So!''... and that's enough, it stops straight away. If you don't yet understand then look deeply into the matter. If there is understanding, when anger arises in the mind you can just shut it off with ''So! It's impermanent!''

Today you have had a chance to record the Dhamma both inwardly and outwardly. Inwardly, the sound enters through the ears to be recorded in the mind. If you can't do this much it's not so good, your time at Wat Pah Pong will be wasted. Record it outwardly, and record it inwardly. This tape recorder here is not so important. The really important thing is the ''recorder'' in the mind. The tape recorder is perishable, but if the Dhamma really reaches the mind it's imperishable, it's there for good. And you don't have to waste money on batteries.




Footnotes

...1

Given on the occasion of a large group of lay people coming to Wat Pah Pong to make offerings to support the monastery

... merit2

''Looking for merit'' is a commonly-used Thai phrase. It refers to the custom in Thailand of going to monasteries, or ''wats'', paying respect to venerated teachers and making offerings.

... they3

There is a play on words here between the Thai words ''look'', meaning children, and ''look bpeun'', meaning literally ''gun children''... that is, bullets.

...tipitaka4

The Buddhist Pāli Canon.



© Wat Nong Pah Pong , 2007

2. Why Are We Here?

This Rains Retreat I don't have much strength, I'm not well, so I've come up to this mountain here to get some fresh air. People come to visit but I can't really receive them like I used to because my voice has just about had it, my breath is just about gone. You can count it a blessing that there is still this body sitting here for you all to see now. This is a blessing in itself. Soon you won't see it. The breath will be finished, the voice will be gone. They will fare in accordance with supporting factors, like all compounded things. The Lord Buddha called it khaya-vayam, the decline and dissolution of all conditioned phenomena.

How do they decline? Consider a lump of ice. Originally it was simply water... they freeze it and it becomes ice. But it doesn't take long before it's melted. Take a big lump of ice, say as big as this tape recorder here, and leave it out in the sun. You can see how it declines, much the same as the body. It will gradually disintegrate. In not many hours or minutes all that's left is a puddle of water. This is called khaya-vayam, the decline and dissolution of all compounded things. It's been this way for a long time now, ever since the beginning of time. When we are born we bring this inherent nature into the world with us, we can't avoid it. At birth we bring old age, sickness and death along with us.

So this is why the Buddha said khaya-vayam, the decline and dissolution of all compounded things. All of us sitting here in this hall now, monks, novices, laymen and laywomen, are without exception ''lumps of deterioration.'' Right now the lump is hard, just like the lump of ice. It starts out as water, becomes ice for a while and then melts again. Can you see this decline in yourself? Look at this body. It's aging every day... hair is aging, nails are aging... everything is aging!

You weren't like this before, were you? You were probably much smaller than this. Now you've grown up and matured. From now on you will decline, following the way of nature. The body declines just like the lump of ice. Soon, just like the lump of ice, it's all gone. All bodies are composed of the four elements of earth, water, wind and fire. A body is the confluence of earth, water, wind, and fire, which we proceed to call a person. Originally it's hard to say what you could call it, but now we call it a ''person.'' We get infatuated with it, saying it's a male, a female, giving it names, Mr., Mrs., and so on, so that we can identify each other more easily. But actually there isn't anybody there. There's earth, water, wind and fire. When they come together in this known form we call the result a ''person.'' Now don't get excited over it. If you really look into it there isn't anyone there.

That which is solid in the body, the flesh, skin, bones and so on, are called the earth element. Those aspects of the body which are liquid are the water element. The faculty of warmth in the body is the fire element, while the winds coursing through the body are the wind element.

At Wat Pah Pong we have a body which is neither male or female. It's the skeleton hanging in the main hall. Looking at it you don't get the feeling that it's a man or a woman. People ask each other whether it's a man or a woman and all they can do is look blankly at each other. It's only a skeleton, all the skin and flesh are gone.

People are ignorant of these things. Some go to Wat Pah Pong, into the main hall, see the skeletons... and then come running right out again! They can't bear to look. They're afraid, afraid of the skeletons. I figure these people have never seen themselves before. Afraid of the skeletons... they don't reflect on the great value of a skeleton. To get to the monastery they had to ride in a car or walk... if they didn't have bones how would they be? Would they be able to walk about like that? But they ride their cars to Wat Pah Pong, go into the main hall, see the skeletons and run straight back out again! They've never seen such a thing before. They're born with it and yet they've never seen it. It's very fortunate that they have a chance to see it now. Even older people see the skeletons and get scared... What's all the fuss about? This shows that they're not at all in touch with themselves, they don't really know themselves. Maybe they go home and still can't sleep for three or four days... and yet they're sleeping with a skeleton! They get dressed with it, eat food with it, do everything with it... and yet they're scared of it.

This shows how out of touch people are with themselves. How pitiful! They're always looking outwards, at trees, at other people, at external objects, saying ''this one is big,'' ''that's small,'' ''that's short,'' ''that's long.'' They're so busy looking at other things they never see themselves. To be honest, people are really pitiful. They have no refuge.

In the ordination ceremonies the ordinees must learn the five basic meditation themes: kesā, head hair; lomā, body hair; nakhā, nails; dantā, teeth; taco, skin. Some of the students and educated people snigger to themselves when they hear this part of the ordination ceremony... ''What's the Ajahn trying to teach us here? Teaching us about hair when we've had it for ages. He doesn't have to teach us about this, we know it already. Why bother teaching us something we already know?'' Dim people are like this, they think they can see the hair already. I tell them that when I say to ''see the hair'' I mean to see it as it really is. See body hair as it really is, see nails, teeth and skin as they really are. That's what I call ''seeing'' - not seeing in a superficial way, but seeing in accordance with the truth. We wouldn't be so sunk up to the ears in things if we could see things as they really are. Hair, nails, teeth, skin... what are they really like? Are they pretty? Are they clean? Do they have any real substance? Are they stable? No... there's nothing to them. They're not pretty but we imagine them to be so. They're not substantial but we imagine them to be so.

Hair, nails, teeth, skin... people are really hooked on these things. The Buddha established these things as the basic themes for meditation, he taught us to know these things. They are transient, Imperfect and ownerless; they are not ''me'' or ''them.'' We are born with and deluded by these things, but really they are foul. Suppose we didn't bathe for a week, could we bear to be close to each other? We'd really smell bad. When people sweat a lot, such as when a lot of people are working hard together, the smell is awful. We go back home and rub ourselves down with soap and water and the smell abates somewhat, the fragrance of the soap replaces it. Rubbing soap on the body may make it seem fragrant, but actually the bad smell of the body is still there, temporarily suppressed. When the smell of the soap is gone the smell of the body comes back again.

Now we tend to think these bodies are pretty, delightful, long lasting and strong. We tend to think that we will never age, get sick or die. We are charmed and fooled by the body, and so we are ignorant of the true refuge within ourselves. The true place of refuge is the mind. The mind is our true refuge. This hall here may be pretty big but it can't be a true refuge. Pigeons take shelter here, geckos take shelter here, lizards take shelter here.... We may think the hall belongs to us but it doesn't. We live here together with everything else. This is only a temporary shelter, soon we must leave it. People take these shelters for refuge.

So the Buddha said to find your refuge. That means to find your real heart. This heart is very important. People don't usually look at important things, they spend most of their time looking at unimportant things. For example, when they do the house cleaning they may be bent on cleaning up the house, washing the dishes and so on, but they fail to notice their own hearts. Their heart may be rotten, they may be feeling angry, washing the dishes with a sour expression on their face. That their own hearts are not very clean they fail to see. This is what I call ''taking a temporary shelter for a refuge.'' They beautify house and home but they don't think of beautifying their own hearts. They don't examine suffering. The heart is the important thing. The Buddha taught to find a refuge within your own heart: Attā hi attano nātho - ''Make yourself a refuge unto yourself.'' Who else can be your refuge? The true refuge is the heart, nothing else. You may try to depend on other things but they aren't a sure thing. You can only really depend on other things if you already have a refuge within yourself. You must have your own refuge first before you can depend on anything else, be it a teacher, family, friends or relatives.

So all of you, both lay people and homeless ones who have come to visit today, please consider this teaching. Ask yourselves, ''Who am I? Why am I here?'' Ask yourselves, ''Why was I born?'' Some people don't know. They want to be happy but the suffering never stops. Rich or poor, young or old, they suffer just the same. It's all suffering. And why? Because they have no wisdom. The poor are unhappy because they don't have enough, and the rich are unhappy because they have too much to look after.

In the past, as a young novice, I gave a Dhamma discourse. I talked about the happiness of wealth and possessions, having servants and so on... A hundred male servants, a hundred female servants, a hundred elephants, a hundred cows, a hundred buffaloes... a hundred of everything! The lay people really lapped it up. But can you imagine looking after a hundred buffaloes? Or a hundred cows, a hundred male and female servants... can you imagine having to look after all of that? Would that be fun? People don't consider this side of things. They have the desire to possess... to have the cows, the buffaloes, the servants... hundreds of them. But I say fifty buffaloes would be too much. Just twining the rope for all those brutes would be too much already! But people don't consider this, they only think of the pleasure of acquiring. They don't consider the trouble involved.

If we don't have wisdom everything round us will be a source of suffering. If we are wise these things will lead us out of suffering. Eyes, ears, nose, tongue, body and mind... Eyes aren't necessarily good things, you know. If you are in a bad mood just seeing other people can make you angry and make you lose sleep. Or you can fall in love with others. Love is suffering, too, if you don't get what you want. Love and hate are both suffering, because of desire. Wanting is suffering, wanting not to have is suffering. Wanting to acquire things... even if you get them it's still suffering because you're afraid you'll lose them. There's only suffering. How are you going to live with that? You may have a large, luxurious house, but if your heart isn't good it never really works out as you expected.

Therefore, you should all take a look at yourselves. Why were we born? Do we ever really attain anything in this life? In the countryside here people start planting rice right from childhood. When they reach seventeen or eighteen they rush off and get married, afraid they won't have enough time to make their fortunes. They start working from an early age thinking they'll get rich that way. They plant rice until they're seventy or eighty or even ninety years old. I ask them, ''From the day you were born you've been working. Now it's almost time to go, what are you going to take with you?'' They don't know what to say. All they can say is, ''Beats me!'' We have a saying in these parts, ''Don't tarry picking berries along the way... before you know it, night falls.'' Just because of this ''Beats me!'' They're neither here nor there, content with just a ''beats me''... sitting among the branches of the berry tree, gorging themselves with berries... ''Beats me, beats me...''

When you're still young you think that being single is not so good, you feel a bit lonely. So you find a partner to live with. Put two together and there's friction! Living alone is too quiet, but living with others there's friction.

When children are small the parents think, ''When they get bigger we'll be better off.'' They raise their children, three, four, or five of them, thinking that when the children are grown up their burden will be lighter. But when the children grow up they get even heavier. Like two pieces of wood, one big and one small. You throw away the small one and take the bigger one, thinking it will be lighter, but of course it's not. When children are small they don't bother you very much, just a ball of rice and a banana now and then. When they grow up they want a motorcycle or a car! Well, you love your children, you can't refuse. So you try to give them what they want. Problems.... Sometimes the parents get into arguments over it... ''Don't go and buy him a car, we haven't got enough money!'' But when you love your children you've got to borrow the money from somewhere. Maybe the parents even have to go without to get the things their children want. Then there's education. ''When they've finished their studies, we'll be all right.'' There's no end to the studying! What are they going to finish? Only in the science of Buddhism is there a point of completion, all the other sciences just go round in circles. In the end it's real headache. If there's a house with four or five children in it the parents argue every day.

The suffering that is waiting in the future we fail to see, we think it will never happen. When it happens, then we know. That kind of suffering, the suffering inherent in our bodies, is hard to foresee. When I was a child minding the buffaloes I'd take charcoal and rub it on my teeth to make them white. I'd go back home and look in the mirror and see them so nice and white.... I was getting fooled by my own bones, that's all. When I reached fifty or sixty my teeth started to get loose. When the teeth start falling out it hurts so much, when you eat it feels as if you've been kicked in the mouth. It really hurts. I've been through this one already. So I just got the dentist to take them all out. Now I've got false teeth. My real teeth were giving me so much trouble I just had them all taken out, sixteen in one go. The dentist was reluctant to take out sixteen teeth at once, but I said to him, ''Just take them out, I'll take the consequences.'' So he took them all out at once. Some were still good, too, at least five of them. Took them all out. But it was really touch and go. After having them out I couldn't eat any food for two or three days.

Before, as a young child minding the buffaloes, I used to think that polishing the teeth was a great thing to do. I loved my teeth, I thought they were good things. But in the end they had to go. The pain almost killed me. I suffered from toothache for months, years. Sometimes both my gums were swollen at once.

Some of you may get a chance to experience this for yourselves someday. If your teeth are still good and you're brushing them everyday to keep them nice and white... watch out! They may start playing tricks with you later on.

Now I'm just letting you know about these things... the suffering that arises from within, that arises within our own bodies. There's nothing within the body you can depend on. It's not too bad when you're still young, but as you get older things begin to break down. Everything begins to fall apart. Conditions go their natural way. Whether we laugh or cry over them they just go on their way. It makes no difference how we live or die, makes no difference to them. And there's no knowledge or science which can prevent this natural course of things. You may get a dentist to look at your teeth, but even if he can fix them they still eventually go their natural way. Eventually even the dentist has the same trouble. Everything falls apart in the end.

These are things which we should contemplate while we still have some vigor, we should practice while we're young. If you want to make merit then hurry up and do so, don't just leave it up to the oldies. Most people just wait until they get old before they will go to a monastery and try to practice Dhamma. Women and men say the same thing... ''Wait till I get old first.'' I don't know why they say that, does an old person have much vigor? Let them try racing with a young person and see what the difference is. Why do they leave it till they get old? Just like they're never going to die. When they get to fifty or sixty years old or more... ''Hey, Grandma! Let's go to the monastery!'' ''You go ahead, my ears aren't so good any more.'' You see what I mean? When her ears were good what was she listening to? ''Beats me!''... just dallying with the berries. Finally when her ears are gone she goes to the temple. It's hopeless. She listens to the sermon but she hasn't got a clue what they're saying. People wait till they're all used up before they'll think of practicing the Dhamma.

Today's talk may be useful for those of you who can understand it. These are things which you should begin to observe, they are our inheritance. They will gradually get heavier and heavier, a burden for each of us to bear. In the past my legs were strong, I could run. Now just walking around they feel heavy. Before, my legs carried me. Now, I have to carry them. When I was a child I'd see old people getting up from their seat... ''Oh!'' Getting up they groan, ''Oh!'' There's always this ''Oh!'' But they don't know what it is that makes them groan like that.

Even when it gets to this extent people don't see the bane of the body. You never know when you're going to be parted from it. What's causing all the pain is simply conditions going about their natural way. People call it arthritis, rheumatism, gout and so on, the doctor prescribes medicines, but it never completely heals. In the end it falls apart, even the doctor! This is conditions faring along their natural course. This is their way, their nature.

Now take a look at this. If you see it in advance you'll be better off, like seeing a poisonous snake on the path ahead of you. If you see it there you can get out of its way and not get bitten. If you don't see it you may keep on walking and step on it. And then it bites.

If suffering arises people don't know what to do. Where to go to treat it? They want to avoid suffering, they want to be free of it but they don't know how to treat it when it arises. And they live on like this until they get old... and sick... and die....

In olden times it was said that if someone was mortally ill one of the next of kin should whisper ''Bud-dho, Bud-dho'' in their ear. What are they going to do with Buddho? What good is Buddho going to be for them when they're almost on the funeral pyre? Why didn't they learn Buddho when they were young and healthy? Now with the breaths coming fitfully you go up and say, ''Mother... Buddho, Buddho!'' Why waste your time? You'll only confuse her, let her go peacefully.

People don't know how to solve problems within their own hearts, they don't have a refuge. They get angry easily and have a lot of desires. Why is this? Because they have no refuge.

When people are newly married they can get on together all right, but after age fifty or so they can't understand each other. Whatever the wife says the husband finds intolerable. Whatever the husband says the wife won't listen. They turn their backs on each other.

Now I'm just talking because I've never had a family before. Why haven't I had a family? Just looking at this word ''household2'' I knew what it was all about. What is a ''household''? This is a ''hold'': If somebody were to get some rope and tie us up while we were sitting here, what would that be like? That's called ''being held.'' Whatever that's like, ''being held'' is like that. There is a circle of confinement. The man lives within his circle of confinement, and the woman lives within her circle of confinement.

When I read this word ''household''... this is a heavy one. This word is no trifling matter, it's a real killer. The word ''hold'' is a symbol of suffering. You can't go anywhere, you've got to stay within your circle of confinement.

Now we come to the word ''house.'' This means ''that which hassles.'' Have you ever toasted chilies? The whole house chokes and sneezes. This word ''household'' spells confusion, it's not worth the trouble. Because of this word I was able to ordain and not disrobe. ''Household'' is frightening. You're stuck and can't go anywhere. Problems with the children, with money and all the rest. But where can you go? You're tied down. There are sons and daughters, arguments in profusion until your dying day, and there's nowhere else to go to no matter how much suffering it is. The tears pour out and they keep pouring. The tears will never be finished with this ''household,'' you know. If there's no household you might be able to finish with the tears but not otherwise.

Consider this matter. If you haven't come across it yet you may later on. Some people have experienced it already to a certain extent. Some are already at the end of their tether... ''Will I stay or will I go?'' At Wat Pah Pong there are about seventy or eighty huts (kuti). when they're almost full I tell the monk in charge to keep a few empty, just in case somebody has an argument with their spouse.... Sure enough, in no long time a lady will arrive with her bags... ''I'm fed up with the world, Luang Por.'' ''Whoa! Don't say that. Those words are really heavy.'' Then the husband comes and says he's fed up too. After two or three days in the monastery their world-weariness disappears.

They say they're fed up but they're just fooling themselves. When they go off to a kuti and sit in the quiet by themselves, after a while the thoughts come... ''When's the wife going to come and ask me to go home?'' They don't really know what's going on. What is this ''world-weariness'' of theirs? They get upset over something and come running to the monastery. At home everything looked wrong... the husband was wrong, the wife was wrong... after three days' quiet thinking... ''Hmmm, the wife was right after all, it was I who was wrong.'' ''Hubby was right, I shouldn't have got so upset.'' They change sides. This is how it is, that's why I don't take the world too seriously. I know its ins and outs already, that's why I've chosen to live as a monk.

I would like to present today's talk to all of you for homework. Whether you're in the fields or working in the city, take these words and consider them... ''Why was I born? What can I take with me?'' Ask yourselves over and over. If you ask yourself these questions often you'll become wise. If you don't reflect on these things you will remain ignorant. Listening to today's talk, you may get some understanding, if not now, then maybe when you get home. Perhaps this evening. When you're listening to the talk everything is subdued, but maybe things are waiting for you in the car. When you get in the car it may get in with you. When you get home it may all become clear... ''Oh, that's what Luang Por meant. I couldn't see it before.''

I think that's enough for today. If I talk too long this old body gets tired.




Footnotes

...1

Given at Wat Tham Saeng Phet (The Monastery of the Diamond Light Cave) to a group of visiting lay people, during the rains retreat of 1981, shortly before Ajahn Chah's health broke down.

...''household2

There is a play on words in the Thai language here based on the word for family - krorp krua - which literally means ''kitchen-frame'' or ''roasting circle.'' In the English translation we have opted for a corresponding English word rather than attempt a literal translation of the Thai.



© Wat Nong Pah Pong , 2007